How Will I Know?

One great thing about being human is that we're all in this together. I use the word "great" when it's actually more to do with  realising that for all our individual insecurities, worries, negative self-talk and self consciousness, it's healthy to know that everyone else out there has issues, problems and so on. We're all connected like that.

Whether it's asking the big questions in life or what I'm having for dinner, for some reason I've been forgetting this basic fact that is part of the human condition. Call it ego or lack of awareness but in recent weeks I've somehow chosen to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders, often in relation to some really mundane issues - how to budget, how to focus more on retirement, the right kind of business enterprise for me etc. It's as if I've forgotten how to trust myself, my instincts, the universe. Today, though, I took a day off, found a bit of perspective and remembered the art of chilling. Sometimes you've just got to realise that not all the answers will be on a plate for you but to believe that, like everyone else out there, growing is what being human is about and we've all got what it takes to keep learning. 

Daydream Believer

First Whitney, now Davy. Today I heard about the passing of Davy Jones, lead singer of the Monkees. Many a drunken student disco was sprinkled with a dash of 'Daydream Believer'. It was the anthem for the incoherent and uncoordinated. You could sway and scream to it and it was socially very acceptable. Everyone knew all the words without actually knowing the words. But for me the song has such a beautiful sentiment. Daydream Believer. We all need a bit of that kind of hope. 

As for Whitney Houston, what a singer and what wonderful memories I have from her songs. I think I must have learned all the words to all the songs on her first album. I was that entranced. And regardless of her well-documented troubles, if she is going to be remembered for anything, at least remember the sentiments of her biggest hit: I Will Always Love You,

Thank you Davy and Whitney. 

Love Me Do

Yes, it's so overwhelmingly commercialized and syrupy and forced. Yes, people shouldn't need one special day in the year to tell their better half how much they care.

Yes, it gives restaurants a good excuse to unnecessarily ramp up their prices for what is often a no better, no worse 'special' meal.

But stripping away all of that, any occasion in our calendar that gets people to at least think and act a bit more positively towards another individual is a good thing.

Happy Belated Valentines Day.

Like A Prayer

At work the other morning I walked past a woman sitting at her desk with her eyes closed. I was a bit curious but just went on my way. A little later, I was doing another lap around the office on the way to the water cooler and there she was again, this time steely-eyed staring at her computer screen.

Curiosity got the better of me and I just had to ask about what I saw earlier. She had been praying. I guess I kind of assumed that might have been the case or possibly meditating. She didn't look like a sleeper to me, anyway. Still, it did get me thinking about stopping, focusing and aligning when the time is right for you - more than just at the beginning or end of the day. Yeah, I like the idea of taking time out on my terms.

The Winner Takes It All

Djokovic. Nadal. Brilliant. Just watching the Australian Open Final got me wishing I'd paid a little more attention in my tennis lessons. Could I have been a contender? No, not a chance. There's no way in hell that my dainty sliced backhand would have got anywhere near the kind of standard these very special athletes have achieved.

Still, there are times I do wonder how good I could have got (or could still get) in certain endeavours - football, darts, tiddly winks and so on. World class? Probably not. But in a way it's probably not the point. It's about beating the competition - and, for me, that "competition" equates to an earlier version of myself. I'll never be the next Nadal or Djokovic but I can be the next version of me - better than last week's version.

Start!

Life is not a spectator sport. Fact. 

I started 2012 in a bit of a funk. A very good Christmas was followed by a great little warm winter break, only to be then followed by that unpleasant kicker of day one back at work. Unlike those that are all guns blazing with New Year's resolutions and targets for the year, I normally am a bit of a slow starter. Dark clouds and hibernation tend to be more my thing for early January. 

Today, however, I decided to take control. Yes, the year starts now. Over the years I've collected books, articles and insights from inspiring luminaries such as Steven Covey, Tony Robbins, Robert Kiyosaki, Jim Rohn, the Barefoot Doctor, Eckhart Tolle and so on. And I've attended so many different types of courses as well - a bit of personal development here, a little spirituality there. Full of goodness. I realised, though, that I've become a bit of a collector - a gatherer of great ideas and outlooks on life, but not actually using them in any coherent or disciplined fashion. Finding balance in the "mind, body, spirit" story is clearly an area of interest for me and I can certainly talk the talk. But I don't walk the walk enough. Yes, in fits and starts, and probably more than the average Joe, but still not enough for what I want to represent. It's great having the pull of awareness but I'll get more value, in my opinion, from the push of initiative. And for this to happen I've got to swallow a bit of manly pride and allow myself to make more mistakes and accept that I don't always have to be right. Scary.

So today I've been trawling through the books, the articles, the insights, noting down some of the key messages and "best bits". It was time to synthesize as it was all getting a bit cluttered. I'm looking for a mix-and-match masterplan that works for me - stuff that I can take into the real world, pushing me forward for this year and beyond rather than just residing in my head. We all go into this New Year's resolution gig with the best intentions. There's no one size fits all and there are no guarantees. We may well fail because of having fuzzy, too many or unrealistic goals, or simply poor planning. It happens. I've got to consider that. But if I do mess up, I don't want it to be because I didn't give it a darn good go. Watch this space.

Step Into Christmas

Well, here we are again. The season of excess and fun and family. Maybe not for everyone but for those of us that were brought up under a certain cultural bias and calendar.

As Christmas ends and the New Year approaches, it's almost impossible not to think ahead in some way. So much hope and expectation, even if we have all been here before.  

Sometimes I wonder whether we have our eye on the wrong prize. When looking at where we are in life we all tend to look up rather than down. We look at things that are missing, that we'd like to have, that we'd like to get done. Yes, it’s important to aspire but looking down can, for want of a better phrase or metaphor, also keep us grounded. There are so, so many people in this world of ours that have far less and could only dream of what we already have in our worlds. Yep, good old fashioned perspective for this time of year.

But at the same time I'm certainly not saying there's anything wrong with looking for a better life. So push on. And come 31 December 2012, what kind of regrets will we be harbouring then? A few hits and a few misses? The thing is what I'm experiencing at this moment is the result of choices and decisions I made in the past; what I'll experience in the future depends on choices and decisions I make now. I can't get all preachy because I'm just as guilty as the next man for that extra double cheeseburger and lack of focus, but deep down we know what we should be doing even if it's so much cosier to take the path of least resistance and all that.

So enjoy the festive season and may all your dreams for 2012 come true - thanks in part to what you're doing towards them now.

Running Up That Hill

Ahh, yes, running up that hill.

Balance. Where are you? I mentioned in my last blog how busy things are getting in my world. Of late, the part-time Masters course has been getting a lot of attention from me.

The trouble is, of course, some areas of my existence have been sidelined - I have barely been to the gym or kung fu (admittedly, that's more down to a sore toe though), the blog has been 'resting', I've made less time for friends, and I've barely registered that fast-approaching event called Christmas.

I realise some of it is temporary but often what starts out as a short-term distraction can turn into a longer-term concern about the balance of life.

Thankfully, once my mid-term exam is out of the way this weekend I'll be able to reconnect a few of the dots. But it has made me think again about the importance of maintaining discipline and balance.

It's not as if we can create more than the 24 hours in a day we're all blessed with so I have to work smarter with what I've been given. In the same way that you can 'leak' money without having a clue as to how it's left your wallet, so too can time be frittered away without any value being added. So it's time for a bit more awareness and to get that routine back on track. It's not about time management - it's about priorities management. Game on!